Posted on Tuesday, January 19, 2016 by Aimee Byrd on Housewife Theologian
I read a disturbing article the other day that wasn’t really all that shocking, but rather a sad reaffirmation of the signs that are all around me. Fewer and fewer people read books these days. Affirming that we are now part of a postliterate society, Peter Denton laments:
 
Simply put, we are no longer a country of readers – at least not of more than 1,000 words in a row. Anything longer is skipped over like those Internet terms of service agreements, jumping to the agree button at the end.
 
Preferring to communicate with images, Vines, and 140 characters or less, Denton points out the irony of how much emphasis and money we put into education, and yet, “We now have the intellectual attention span of squirrels – and it shows.” 
 
For anyone who doesn’t read many books anymore or who thinks we have all we need on the Internet, I wanted to share a few reasons why we should still read books. I’ve gathered these reasons after reading a book, How to Read a Book, by Mortimer  Adler and Charles Van Doren (Yes, that’s how much of a nerd I am):
 
Because there is a big difference between gathering information and reading for discovery and understanding. Articles, tweets, and Facebook posts can give us some new information. But we are usually getting this information at a level that is easy to consume and purposefully not challenging to our own intellect. But learning is about more than absorbing new information. Information is just the basic building block to stretching our understanding and moving on to discovery. In order to grow in this way, we need more than a 1,000 word article even. We need to read from people over our head and engage in the process of learning from them so that we can then connect that knowledge to other ideas for new discoveries. It’s all very exciting, but the shallow waters of the internet will never get you there.
 
Difficulty does not mean we should stop. The Internet is physiologically changing our brains. I am going to repost an article on Thursday about this challenge. It’s becoming harder for us to focus on reading a whole article, much less an entire book. But we don’t have to give in to that. We need to exercise our brains to keep the firing paths moving for endurance in our attention spans and capacity to think deeply. Just like a constant diet of fast food makes us flabby, so too a constant intake of social media to the neglect of books and thoughtful meditation will make our brains flabby. So if you find it difficult to read more than five pages at a time or you find yourself falling asleep as soon you crack open a book, that is a sign that you should be putting in the work that it takes to be an active reader. It doesn’t mean that books aren’t for you. The rewards are always better when we prep a meal with fresh ingredients than when we are in a hurry and hit the drive-thru.
 
To join the conversation. Authors write books because they have done a lot of reading and have made some discoveries that they would like to share in a meaningful way. An article or two isn’t going to cut it. Neither is a Vimeo or a Meme. So they put the crazy mad time into the process of writing a book. But readers are an important part of the conversation. Some people don’t read because they think it is isolating and they would rather be with people. But that is an inaccurate understanding of the process. When you read a book, you are engaging with a person, the author. And the intent of the author isn’t for you to shut the book and move on with your life, as if this were just a private affair. “Reading a book is a kind of conversation” and the reader now has a duty to reciprocate (137). There are all kinds of ways to engage in the conversation, the easiest being just to talk about these ideas to others or share the book. But my next point takes it one step further.
 
To develop critical skills of discernment. Joining the conversation should be more than regurgitating ideas. Adler and Van Doren have some great advice regarding our teachability: “A person is wrongly thought to be teachable if he is passive and pliable. On the contrary, teachability is an extremely active virtue. No one is really teachable who does not freely exercise his power of independent judgment. He can be trained, of course, but not taught. The most teachable reader is, therefore, the most critical” (140). This is an art that I really see lacking in the church. Animals can be trained; people ask questions, look for propositions, points of persuasion, and interact with ideas. I’m afraid our lack of intelligent reading has disarmed us from developing these critical skills.
 
Because “knowledge can be communicated and that discussion can result in learning” (149). If we believe that every claim a person makes is merely an opinion that is equal to all other opinions, then there really isn’t much of a reason to read books. But if we believe that truth has content and that we can actually appeal to that through the act of reason and logic, then we should be truth-seekers. And this gives us a purpose to reading---to learn! An author with a likeable personality is certainly a bonus, but I read with a goal to learn something from a book, which is also what helps me to finish the book. 
 
Good books last longer than blog posts, which fade into cyberspace hoping for a Google search to one day bring them to light again. And they seek a higher purpose in shaping a reader. Read for discovery and understanding, not just to gather information. Read to develop your critical thinking skills. Be teachable and then teach others. Read books!
Posted on Monday, January 04, 2016 by Aimee Byrd on Housewife Theologian
As Todd has already posted, things are not making much sense in the world of complementary leadership. This past weekend, John Piper spoke to a crowd of over 40,000 people, sharing a platform with Word-Faith preacher Christine Caine.
 
I found out about it from this Tweet by Denny Burk, who had earlier challenged a response Carl and I had to Piper when we said that all men do not have authority over all women. Burk said that in affirming the ordained office was for certain men, Carl and I did not take complementary relationships between men and women far enough. But somehow it is okay to tweet out an advertisement for his followers to live stream the Passion conference, where there is a not only a woman preaching, but one who teaches Word Faith doctrines. And John Piper’s face is right beside Caine’s, as they shared the platform for this major conference.
 
I agree with Todd that Piper has done much good for the Reformed(ish) community. And I enjoy reading much of what Denny Burk writes. But that is why I am so frustrated. These conversations are important. All this talk about complementary means nothing if you do not care about women. And while I believe that Piper and Burke do care about women, this kind of platform sharing and promoting gives a very different message.
 
Here’s the thing: I am constantly using the platform that I have to plea to pastors regarding the commodification of the so-called Christian market to women. I am trying to provide resources to help pastors see what the bestsellers are in the Christian women’s genre. I am appealing to women to hone their discernment skills and take responsibility in their discipleship. This is my passion, for women to be good theologians. And there are many women who take this seriously. 
 
Unfortunately, I have talked with far too many motivated women who are dealing with shallow women’s studies, or worse, just plain false teaching in their church’s women’s ministries. One of the biggest laments is that the elders have no knowledge of the harm that these studies are inflicting on the women in their congregation. And the message from silence is that the women don’t really matter. False teachers know how much women matter. Christian publishers know how much women matter as a target consumer base. The Passion conference knows how much women matter in ticket sales. 
 
While the church, above all, knows that women are not tools for deception or a commodity for the market, it can sometimes be the very place where they feel undervalued in their most important role of all---disciples of Christ! This takes initiative from the leadership in the church to turn around. And it would be helpful if some of the most vocal voices for complementarianism would step up and care about what is being marketed to women! We are being used! Is it okay to promote anti-intellectualism among the women in the church, as long as someone like John Piper will be speaking there too? Does that redeem everything, because 40,000 people will hear his message while also listening to Christine Caine’s? And is it okay for the women in his church to do a study on her books? Or doesn’t it matter, because that is the women’s studies and they will never be church leaders anyway?
 
Meanwhile, women are hardly getting a seat at the table to talk about general theology at all the coed conferences that the complementarians host. I hope that more men and women will speak out about this. Don’t we have something to say here? Isn’t our feminine perspective valuable? Or are our contributions only valuable when we are talking about women’s issues and roles? Don’t we want to take a stand to nurture competent women in the church and seek their contributions as well? 
 
I believe the Bible teaches that the office of ministry is for certain, qualified men. I believe that husbands are the heads of their households. But there is no complementary going on if women are not valued for their contributions, if women are not invested in, and if their gifts are not recognized, honed, and appreciated. Instead, we have women being used as a commodity to buy books that exploit their empathy and emotions, to buy tickets to pack conferences that downplay any theological integrity, and instead of speaking out against it, the very men who insist on biblical precision for male leadership are participating in the rigmarole.
 
Posted on Friday, January 01, 2016 by Aimee Byrd on Housewife Theologian

This is a prayer that I have been using a lot lately from The Valley of Vision. Today I am seeing it in a new light, as it is a wonderful prayer for the new year:

 

Oh God, the Author of all good,

 

I come to thee for grace another day will require for its duties and events.
I step out into a wicked world, I carry about with me a wicked heart,
I know that without thee I can do nothing,
          that everything with which I shall be concerned,
          however harmless in itself, 
          may prove an occasion of sin or folly,
          unless I am kept by thy power.
Hold me thou up and I shall be safe.
Preserve my understanding from subtlety of error,
          my affections from love of idols, 
          my character from stain of vice,
          my profession from every form of evil.
May I engage in nothing in which I cannot implore thy blessing,
          and in which I cannot invite thy inspection.
Prosper me in lawful undertakings, or prepare me for disappointments;
Give me neither poverty nor riches; 
Feed me with food convenient for me, lest I be full and deny thee
          and say, Who is the Lord?
          or be poor, and steal, and take thy name in vain.
May every creature be made good to me by prayer and thy will;
Teach me how to use the world, and not abuse it,
          to improve my talents, to redeem my time, 
          to walk in wisdom toward those without, 
          and in kindness to those within,
          to do good to all men, 
          and especially my fellow Christians.
And to thee be the glory.
Posted on Friday, December 18, 2015 by Aimee Byrd on Housewife Theologian
I am picking up a theme in the titles of the bestsellers for Christian women. Beth Moore challenges us to an Audacious love for Jesus, and the one-word title of Priscilla Shirer’s book tells us what kind of prayer-life we need: Fervent. The success of these books says something about what women must be seeking, something more special and beyond the ordinary, something passionate and motivating. And who wouldn’t want a fervent prayer life? 
 
Fervent is the #1 bestselling book for Christian women, having an average 5-star rating with 525 reviews on Amazon. This book is inspired by a popular movie in the Christian subculture called The War Room. Shirer starred in the movie (with Beth Moore). The subtitle of this book and purpose in writing is: A Woman’s Battle Plan for Serious, Specific, and Strategic Prayer. In her introduction, she explains:
 
Because this is war. The fight of your life. A very real enemy has been strategizing and scheming against you, assaulting you, coming after your emotions, your mind, your man, your child, your future. In fact, he’s doing it right this second. Right where you’re sitting. Right where you are. (2)
 
And she wants us to know that “praying with precision is key” (3). Fervent tackles ten areas where “the enemy is at work,” strategizing against us.
 
Shirer is in tune with the areas where women struggle. Each chapter cleverly begins with a strategy like, “If I were your enemy, I’d seek to dim your passion” (25), or “I’d devalue your strength and magnify your insecurities until they dominate how you see yourself” (55). I found myself flitting back and forth between agreement and “yeah buts” in this book. Shirer is so good at honing in on the gritty challenges women fight, she wants us to be more aware of spiritual warfare, and each chapter ends with a couple of pages of scripture related to it’s topic that we should use in prayer.
 
How She Describes Prayer
 
And yet there are some major things missing for a book that is about fervent prayer. When I read a book about prayer, I expect to learn about prayer and, well, the One we pray to. But I felt like this book is more about women’s struggles and Satan’s strategies. And while I don’t disagree that Satan has personal and tricky strategies, I felt like he gets the bulk of the blame for our lack of spiritual growth. Sin seems consequential to Satan’s ploys in this book. We need to hear that sin is a serious personal offense against God. We aren’t merely strategizing in prayer so that we have good marriages, a fabulous self-image, and peace in our lives. 
 
Even when she speaks about repentance, Shirer doesn’t mention confessing our sin and asking for forgiveness. She does tell us to “see the foolishness of anything that perpetuates old sin patterns, and by His Spirit walk away,” and then, “Ask for freedom, for release, for the ability to deflect lies and embrace truth” (101). This all has the tone of self-empowerment by “claiming your calling” (105), rather than humbly submitting to a holy God whom we have offended. The word sin doesn’t even appear in her definition of repentance, which is the “R” in her acronym P.R.A.Y.
 
Let me just contrast what Shirer says about prayer with a recent book I’ve read that had a chapter on prayer, Daniel Block’s For the Glory of God
 
Shirer: "Prayer is the portal that brings the power of heaven down to earth. It is kryptonite to the enemy and to all his ploys against you. (5)
Block: "Prayer is not about informing God of our needs as if he is ignorant; instead, it is 'a vehicle of humility, an expression of un-self-sufficiency, which in biblical thought, is the proper stance of humans before God.'” (212, quoting from Moshe Greenberg)
 
Shirer’s book reads like a “devil-busting” plan that we need to have, “with God on [our] side.” But I go to prayer to align myself with God’s plan. And yet, prayer is even more than that. As Block defines, “First, prayer is the supreme reverential verbal act of submission and homage before the divine Sovereign. Like all worship, true prayer is concerned primarily with the glory of God” (217). This is what I was missing in Fervent. Yes, there were some glimpses that made me wish Shirer would continue in that direction, but they were few and far between her focus on Satan’s strategies and our own in prayer.
 
Even the title misses the focus. Sure, a fervent prayer life is a good thing. But if every prayer is fervent, I think it loses it’s fervency. Every conversation with my husband is not fervent. And I love fervent kisses, but it would get weird if every time we were intimate, it had to be fervently. And if I felt like it had to be, I would end up doing a lot of faking. I’m glad we don’t have to go to God fervently every time we pray. And I would rather learn more about prayer itself, especially the God we are praying to, rather than an emotional way to go about it as a strategy against Satan.
 
Exposition
 
I love the fact that Shirer ends each chapter with Scriptures that would be good to pray on that topic. However, I wish she would have designed the chapters around some of those Scriptures, maybe showcasing some helpful ways to pray through them. 
 
And yet, I’m not sure how well that would be executed. I have some concerns with how Scripture is handled in a few of the teaching places. For example, she teaches through 2 Kings 6:1-7 to show a strategy on how to get our passion back. Shirer teaches that when one of Elisha's protégés lost the iron head from his ax in the water, he “lost his cutting edge.” She has some good principles laid out to teach, like, “Despite the lost ax head, the presence of God was still near” (31), but the exposition and application itself is hokey and wrong. She connects this text to how our “cutting edge” in prayer may be lost. And so she says we could be doing something good, and still lose our cutting edge, our passion in prayer. “In fact, one of Satan’s dirtiest little tactics is to sneak in and steal it while you’re square in the middle of investing yourself in worthwhile activities” (32). This is just not what the passage is saying. She then connects the fact that this was a borrowed ax to the fact that we get our passion from God, and the enemy doesn’t want us to know that. And just like this man, we may need a miracle to get our cutting edge back.
 
This is just bad exposition and application of Scripture. Nowhere does the text insinuate that this event has something to do with the passion in our prayer life or attacks from Satan. She just uses a play on words and turns it all around. That’s really a shame.
 
Subjective Obedience?
 
Also, there are times in the book where Shirer refers to being obedient to God’s word, when she is really talking about obedience to where you think the Holy Spirit is leading you. A distinction needs to be made here. She very well may have a different theological stance than me on the continuation of prophetic gifts as they were in the apostolic times. And so Shirer describes a friend who had a good job and family life, but was hesitant about venturing out to becoming a writer, something she felt the Lord may be leading her to do. Maybe he was, but Shirer takes this as direct disobedience against the Lord if her friend were not to take that step.
 
I’m not so sure it would have been. Is there anywhere in Scripture that says the jobs we are supposed to take? She wasn’t sinning in her job she was in; she was serving God well in it. Could the Holy Spirit be leading and preparing her for writing? Of course, but she did not know for sure. What if it failed, would the Spirit have then failed? She talks about her friend “implement[ing] obedience” and “going forward as instructed” (117), and this concerns me that women reading may also interpret all their dreams as direct orders from the Lord that they must obey. Where is this in Scripture?
 
Shirer ends the book sharing a prophecy she was given in a Bible study that she “would have the privilege of calling many people to prayer during [her] lifetime. And not just to prayer but to a refreshed, renewed focus and fervency of prayer they’d never known before” (186). She then writes about her realization that God was whispering in her ear that night about the readers of this very book. It kind of makes it awkward to review after that.
 
The Devil Behind Every Rock?
 
You’ve heard this phrase before, I’m sure, and that is how I felt about the main message in this book. Again, I think we could all use a wake up call about spiritual warfare. But we should never give Satan more credit than he deserves. We do a good job of sinning on our own. Shirer blames it all on the devil:
 
Because if it weren’t for him trying to get in there and cause trouble, would any of us be feeling the need to nurse hurt feelings, harbor unforgiveness, belabor the gossip, or (for goodness sake) find a whole new set of friends? (177)
 
All of our proclivity to sin is not Satan’s fault. We need to take responsibility for our own sinful nature. James tells us, “But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death” (1:14-15). In this age, we live under the effects of the curse. So our suffering could be from many different things. Yes, we need to be aware of Satan, who is at work, but Scripture’s emphasis is more on our personal responsibility and our focus on the Lord.
 
So while Shirer did point out some activity of the devil that we need to be mindful of, I wish she would have focused the book on the person and work of Christ before diving into warfare. She opens the book saying that praying with precision is key. I wish that there was more precision in her teaching on prayer itself, her biblical exposition, and her theology on sin, God’s revelation, and spiritual warfare.

 

Posted on Friday, December 18, 2015 by Aimee Byrd on Housewife Theologian
I am picking up a theme in the titles of the bestsellers for Christian women. Beth Moore challenges us to an Audacious love for Jesus, and the one-word title of Priscilla Shirer’s book tells us what kind of prayer-life we need: Fervent. The success of these books says something about what women must be seeking, something more special and beyond the ordinary, something passionate and motivating. And who wouldn’t want a fervent prayer life? 
 
Fervent is the #1 bestselling book for Christian women, having an average 5-star rating with 525 reviews on Amazon. This book is inspired by a popular movie in the Christian subculture called The War Room. Shirer starred in the movie (with Beth Moore). The subtitle of this book and purpose in writing is: A Woman’s Battle Plan for Serious, Specific, and Strategic Prayer. In her introduction, she explains:
 
Because this is war. The fight of your life. A very real enemy has been strategizing and scheming against you, assaulting you, coming after your emotions, your mind, your man, your child, your future. In fact, he’s doing it right this second. Right where you’re sitting. Right where you are. (2)
 
And she wants us to know that “praying with precision is key” (3). Fervent tackles ten areas where “the enemy is at work,” strategizing against us.
 
Shirer is in tune with the areas where women struggle. Each chapter cleverly begins with a strategy like, “If I were your enemy, I’d seek to dim your passion” (25), or “I’d devalue your strength and magnify your insecurities until they dominate how you see yourself” (55). I found myself flitting back and forth between agreement and “yeah buts” in this book. Shirer is so good at honing in on the gritty challenges women fight, she wants us to be more aware of spiritual warfare, and each chapter ends with a couple of pages of scripture related to it’s topic that we should use in prayer.
 
How She Describes Prayer
 
And yet there are some major things missing for a book that is about fervent prayer. When I read a book about prayer, I expect to learn about prayer and, well, the One we pray to. But I felt like this book is more about women’s struggles and Satan’s strategies. And while I don’t disagree that Satan has personal and tricky strategies, I felt like he gets the bulk of the blame for our lack of spiritual growth. Sin seems consequential to Satan’s ploys in this book. We need to hear that sin is a serious personal offense against God. We aren’t merely strategizing in prayer so that we have good marriages, a fabulous self-image, and peace in our lives. 
 
Even when she speaks about repentance, Shirer doesn’t mention confessing our sin and asking for forgiveness. She does tell us to “see the foolishness of anything that perpetuates old sin patterns, and by His Spirit walk away,” and then, “Ask for freedom, for release, for the ability to defect lies and embrace truth” (101). This all has the tone of self-empowerment by “claiming your calling” (105), rather than humbly submitting to a holy God whom we have offended. The word sin doesn’t even appear in her definition of repentance, which is the “R” in her acronym P.R.A.Y.
 
Let me just contrast what Shirer says about prayer with a recent book I’ve read that had a chapter on prayer, Daniel Block’s For the Glory of God
 
Shirer: "Prayer is the portal that brings the power of heaven down to earth. It is kryptonite to the enemy and to all his ploys against you. (5)
Block: "Prayer is not about informing God of our needs as if he is ignorant; instead, it is 'a vehicle of humility, an expression of un-self-sufficiency, which in biblical thought, is the proper stance of humans before God.'” (212, quoting from Moshe Greenberg)
 
Shirer’s book reads like a “devil-busting” plan that we need to have, “with God on [our] side.” But I go to prayer to align myself with God’s plan. And yet, prayer is even more than that. As Block defines, “First, prayer is the supreme reverential verbal act of submission and homage before the divine Sovereign. Like all worship, true prayer is concerned primarily with the glory of God” (217). This is what I was missing in Fervent. Yes, there were some glimpses that made me wish Shirer would continue in that direction, but they were few and far between her focus on Satan’s strategies and our own in prayer.
 
Even the title misses the focus. Sure, a fervent prayer life is a good thing. But if every prayer is fervent, I think it loses it’s fervency. Every conversation with my husband is not fervent. And I love fervent kisses, but it would get weird if every time we were intimate, it had to be fervently. And if I felt like it had to be, I would end up doing a lot of faking. I’m glad we don’t have to go to God fervently every time we pray. And I would rather learn more about prayer itself, especially the God we are praying to, rather than an emotional way to go about it as a strategy against Satan.
 
Exposition
 
I love the fact that Shirer ends each chapter with Scriptures that would be good to pray on that topic. However, I wish she would have designed the chapters around some of those Scriptures, maybe showcasing some helpful ways to pray through them. 
 
And yet, I’m not sure how well that would be executed. I have some concerns with how Scripture is handled in a few of the teaching places. For example, she teaches through 2 Kings 6:1-7 to show a strategy on how to get our passion back. Shirer teaches that when one of Elisha's protégés lost the iron head from his ax in the water, he “lost his cutting edge.” She has some good principles laid out to teach, like, “Despite the lost ax head, the presence of God was still near” (31), but the exposition and application itself is hokey and wrong. She connects this text to how our “cutting edge” in prayer may be lost. And so she says we could be doing something good, and still lose our cutting edge, our passion in prayer. “In fact, one of Satan’s dirties little tactics is to sneak in and steal it while you’re square in the middle of investing yourself in worthwhile activities” (32). This is just not what the passage is saying. She then connects the fact that this was a borrowed ax to the fact that we get our passion from God, and the enemy doesn’t want us to know that. And just like this man, we may need a miracle to get our cutting edge back.
 
This is just bad exposition and application of Scripture. Nowhere does the text insinuate that this event has something to do with the passion in our prayer life or attacks from Satan. She just uses a play on words and turns it all around. That’s really a shame.
 
Subjective Obedience?
 
Also, there are times in the book where Shirer refers to being obedient to God’s word, when she is really talking about obedience to where you think the Holy Spirit is leading you. A distinction needs to be made here. She very well may have a different theological stance than me on the continuation of prophetic gifts as they were in the apostolic times. And so Shirer describes a friend who had a good job and family life, but was hesitant about venturing out to becoming a writer, something she felt the Lord may be leading her to do. Maybe he was, but Shirer takes this as direct disobedience against the Lord if her friend were not to take that step.
 
I’m not so sure it would have been. Is there anywhere in Scripture that says the jobs we are supposed to take? She wasn’t sinning in her job she was in; she was serving God well in it. Could the Holy Spirit be leading and preparing her for writing? Of course, but she did not know for sure. What if it failed, would the Spirit have then failed? She talks about her friend “implement[ing] obedience” and “going forward as instructed” (117), and this concerns me that women reading may also interpret all their dreams as direct orders from the Lord that they must obey. Where is this in Scripture?
 
Shirer ends the book sharing a prophecy she was given in a Bible study that she “would have the privilege of calling many people to prayer during [her] lifetime. And not just to prayer but to a refreshed, renewed focus and fervency of prayer they’d never known before” (186). She then writes about her realization that God was whispering in her ear that night about the readers of this very book. It kind of makes it awkward to review after that.
 
The Devil Behind Every Rock?
 
You’ve heard this phrase before, I’m sure, and that is how I felt about the main message in this book. Again, I think we could all use a wake up call about spiritual warfare. But we should never give Satan more credit than he deserves. We do a good job of sinning on our own. Shirer blames it all on the devil:
 
Because if it weren’t for him trying to get in there and cause trouble, would any of us be feeling the need to nurse hurt feelings, harbor unforgiveness, belabor the gossip, or (for goodness sake) find a whole new set of friends? (177)
 
All of our proclivity to sin is not Satan’s fault. We need to take responsibility for our own sinful nature. James tells us, “But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death” (1:14-15). In this age, we live under the effects of the curse. So our suffering could be from many different things. Yes, we need to be aware of Satan, who is at work, but Scripture’s emphasis is more on our personal responsibility and our focus on the Lord.
 
So while Shirer did point out some activity of the devil that we need to be mindful of, I wish she would have focused the book on the person and work of Christ before diving into warfare. She opens the book saying that praying with precision is key. I wish that there was more precision in her teaching on prayer itself, her biblical exposition, and her theology on sin, God’s revelation, and spiritual warfare.
Posted on Wednesday, December 09, 2015 by Aimee Byrd on Housewife Theologian
Well, this is the time of year that bloggers are offering their top-ten, or for the more audacious, top 50 books of the year. I’ve never been one to rate my books, but I thought I might try something a little different. I thought I’d take a look at the current bestselling Christian books for women. I have just read the number two bestseller, as the number one was out of stock and is now in the mail. You probably won’t be surprised that Beth Moore takes up several spots on the bestseller list, and she is sitting in at number two with her release, hot of the press in November, titled Audacious. It’s kind of a Radical meets Purpose Driven Life, meets your best girlfriend. Reading this book, and I believe the ones after it, is an education on the Christian market, the niche for women, and our actual goals here.
 
There’s all kinds of research that points to the differences between the male and female brains. But as soon as you begin looking into that, you will find all kinds of research debunking that research. There are some proven neurological differences, but how that then transfers into the way we process information, interact, and learn, can be tricky. One popular teaching is that men systemize and women empathize. While there seems to be some general observable truth in this even, there are also many exceptions. 
 
We don’t all fit so neatly into these categories. Most of us tend to be more nuanced than that. I enjoy a good chapter on the chiastic structure of a biblical text. Does that make me masculine? Of course not. But when I look at the bestsellers list for women in the Christian market, I see that we are targeted for our empathetic tendencies. When I look at the books for men, I do see more of a systematic approach. And if these books are selling so well, then there must be something to this. 
 
This is where Beth Moore comes in. Audacious is ranked #2 on Amazon, under "Christian Books for Women’s Issues." It’s also the #2 bestselling book for women on CBD. That’s quite an accomplishment in sales. A lot of women are reading this book. Moore is a likeable person. And she is extremely empathetic. The book reads like a journal, with Moore sharing personal details from her childhood, even opening up about being molested, and then moving right into hilariously embarrassing moments. She can certainly weave a story and draw in a reader’s emotions.
 
After thirty years of Christian ministry to women, this book serves as a reflection on the work she has done and what she seems to think may have been the missing link in her ministry. And that missing link is that although she has always had the mission to “see women come to know and love Jesus Christ,” she has noticed a lack of desire and verve in the spiritual lives of women. Moore proposed that the missing link is an audacious love for Christ.
 
Moore seems to have a driving passion for women to love Jesus. And her writing reveals a strong pursuit for this in her own life, as well as an overall love for living. That is an attractive quality, for sure. But Moore characterizes this love primary by feelings, and this is where the message is incomplete. The message comes off sounding a lot like the world’s “follow your heart,” or “if you dream it (audaciously), you can achieve it.” While I agree with Moore that we should have stronger desires for the Lord, and that our spiritual growth is not merely based on duty and doctrine, our greatest barrier to love Jesus rightly isn’t our lack of audacity, but our great sinfulness. We are audacious sinners. It would be much more profitable to move the focus from our own feelings, to learn more about the person and the work of Jesus Christ. How do we know our real need when we haven’t meditated on the holiness of God and the depravity of man? This isn’t addressed in the book. 
 
Moore uses the account of the woman at the well in John 4 and the call to ask God according to his will in 1 John 5:14-15 to come up with the formula:
 
If you only knew + you would ask Me = I would give you.
 
She quotes Mark 12:28-30 to teach that God’s will for us is that we love him audaciously, and all we have to do is ask for that desire. But she misses the thrust of the teaching at the well. The most “audacious” thing Jesus says isn’t “if you knew,” but “I am he.” She doesn’t even address how Jesus reveals himself to this woman and our absolute need for him to do this. Jesus also points out the woman’s sin before revealing himself.  Love is not just a gushy feeling. The text from Mark shows that it is a command. We need to love God more than our sin, and oh how we fall short! Maybe we don’t love because we don’t repent. Maybe we don’t love because we really don’t know God. That’s what I was hoping to read.
 
The chapters in the book all build on this audacious theme. So the message that I come away with is that our greatest problem is our lack of boldness. I just don’t agree with that. And yet, there is a lot of biblical truth in Moore’s teaching. However, it is mixed with an emotionalism that is man-centered. And then her appeal is to ask if we have the audacity to take what Jesus has done personally, or whether we have the audacity to believe how Jesus has adventurously, daringly, and boldly pursued us (52). But what we need is faith, and that is a gift from God. I wish there was less talk about our verve and more about the faith.
 
This is why I think the market is doing us a disservice by over-pandering to gender distinctions. It stunts our growth. By over-appealing to empathy in women, we are getting a lot of story (the first five pages of a chapter on cleaning out the attic), a lot of emotion, and a lot of appeal to our insecurities, but not much solid doctrinal teaching. 
 
Speaking of, Moore closes her book with a chapter, “The Best Part,” on experiencing the Holy Spirit. This chapter seems to be a defense on some of the criticism she has received regarding what God tells her personally. She does admit several times that she has never heard God’s voice audibly. But she encourages the reader to follow subjective promptings that may or may not be from the Holy Spirit. She even does this in a self-depreciating way, sharing a hilarious story of how she thought she was experiencing a personal miracle of God enlarging the communion elements in her mouth, only later to find out she went through the gluten-free line. She shares another experience, which she says makes it all worth it, where the Spirit led her to give a stranger in need money to move out of a bad situation. This chapter makes me sad because there is a clear way to be led by the Spirit. The Spirit operates through his Word. So if we are living in light of God’s Word, praying for wisdom and discernment, within the context of regular fellowship in the covenant community of God’s people, and loving our neighbor, then we are living by the Spirit. I think that’s pretty audacious living.
 
Beth Moore is an emotionally intelligent woman. And by all means, she appears to have a heart that wants to serve the Lord, while encouraging others to do so.  And women do tend to be more emotionally intelligent. This can be a great strength, one that men can learn from us, and also a great weakness, if we are not growing in other ways. And this is where I see the danger in pandering to generalizations about our sexes. While I still don’t think we break down into such simple categories, both the so-called systemizers and empathizers reflect the image of God. And we need to learn from one another. Does a man who is nurturing and emotionally intelligent lack masculinity? No! I believe that he is maturing as a man in the image of God. Is a woman who can parallel park like a boss and write a killer business plan unfeminine? Heck no, she is admirable. I wish we could reflect this truth more in the Christian market. Clearly many women are attracted to empathetic writing. But that doesn’t mean we should get away with loose theology.
Posted on Tuesday, December 01, 2015 by Aimee Byrd on Housewife Theologian
Here is an exerpt from my article in the Ordained Servant's latest issue, the OPC Journal for church officers:
 
The OPC values robust theological teaching. This is evident in the confession (Westminster) to which our denomination subscribes and the investment we put into our preachers. However, one area where this may not be as noticeable is in women’s initiatives. I am thankful that the OPC esteems the offices of the ministry, which is why I want to encourage the officers of the church to become more invested in the women’s groups that study together.
 
Please do not misunderstand. I know that women are valued in the OPC. The invitation to write this article reveals an interest in equipping women with good resources and helping pastors and elders gain awareness of what is being marketed to women. Whether women in your church are gathering together for a study, or shopping for their own personal reading and growth, they have become a valued target market for the so-called Christian publishing industry. From Bible studies to personal growth books, there is now a copious supply of resources available for women. The Christian bookstore can be a dangerous place to enter without proper discernment. And we do not want the women’s study groups in the church to be dangerous places to enter without proper discernment.
 
Unfortunately, I have seen this become an issue even in OPC and PCA churches. And I don’t think that it is because of the preaching. I have done a fair amount of traveling, speaking at women’s retreats for Presbyterian, Baptist, non-denominational churches, and more. It is such a blessing to meet and talk with so many Christian women who desire to grow in God’s Word. However, it is also disheartening to see women, across the board, caught up in poor theology. And it often causes discord in the church. Many of these women are under good preaching, and they claim to have a high view of Scripture. And yet some of the material they are studying with other women in the church, or reading for their own personal growth, contradicts the clear teaching of Scripture. How can this be? Why are numerous women embracing false teaching?
 
While good preaching is imperative, I think this is also a shepherding issue for pastors and elders. A pastor loves to hear that his congregation is taking initiative to learn more about what Scripture teaches. It’s a challenge sometimes to find people who love to read. But what are they reading, and how are they processing the information?
 
I like to compare this situation to the wake up call parents had when the television talk shows and news networks conducted faux abduction investigations, revealing the inadequacies of the whole “stranger danger” message. No matter how confident these parents felt about their talks with their children about never going off with a stranger under any condition, the whole “I lost my puppy, could you help me find him” guise worked every time. The problem is that predators are very friendly; they don’t look like the monsters that their parents make them out to be. What child wouldn’t want to help a smiley guy with a picture find man's best friend?
 
My illustration isn’t meant to compare women with children. I am talking more about a shepherd and his sheep. This really applies to the whole congregation because there are plenty of men reading and promoting harmful doctrine as well. But I’m writing to talk specifically about women’s resources. When a top-selling Christian author, who belongs to a big church, who has adopted children from third world countries, and who relates to the everyday Christian woman, offers a “stimulating” study on how to help “overwhelmed women” with an “underwhelmed soul,” she sure doesn’t look like the image we may have of a false teacher.[1] These great qualities easily distract a reader from asking discerning questions about how the gospel is presented and how God’s Word is being handled.
 
If pastors and elders become more aware of the books that are being marketed to their congregations, it will be time well spent. What are the top-sellers in the Christian bookstore, and how faithful are they to God’s Word? What is their appeal? Why would some of your congregants be attracted to their teaching? This does take a lot of shepherding, because it also takes an invested relationship between elders and the congregation.
 
For some practical suggestions and recommendations, read the rest of the article here.
Posted on Monday, November 23, 2015 by Aimee Byrd on Housewife Theologian
I have done some writing on difficulties of navigating the dating world now that I have daughters approaching that age. And we have done a Mortification of Spin podcast on the topic of courtship and dating, in which Carl’s biggest piece of advice was to just have sons. 
 
But is he a man who can follow his own advice? At first glance, it may appear to be so, given the Truemans have two biological sons. But first glances can be tricky.
 
You may have heard of a certain MAD Woman in the Attic, who is part of the production team at MoS. She is a single young woman who has relocated to PA after attending WTS and happens to attend Carl’s church. Interestingly, we were just interviewing Kelly Kapic from Covenant College, and he mentioned that it would be good for church families to take in the college students and singles as a sort of adopted family member, being that they are away from their biological families. Kelly didn’t know that is exactly what the Truemans have done. 
 
Yes, that’s right, Carl now has voluntarily entered the world of being a father figure to a young woman. He has let the MAD Woman out of the attic, but is very concerned over this dating business. Perhaps it would have been better for MAD to return to Georgia as a stay-at-home daughter. Maybe she wouldn’t have to endure the pre-date interview awkwardness. But, as you can see, she seems to be pretty comfortable with the dating guidelines. The question now is, which one is truly MAD? Or maybe MAD doesn't mean what you think it does...
 
Either way, I wouldn't take daughter dating advice from Carl.
 
Posted on Tuesday, November 10, 2015 by Aimee Byrd on Housewife Theologian
The responses to my last blog about the lack of older women who are writing and speaking in our Reformed and reformedish circles have been encouraging. The fact that my combox is filled with refreshing and engaging interaction testifies that there are women over 40 who would like to contribute more in this way and that are indeed serving with their gifts in the local body of their church. 
 
I am most encouraged by the consensus that we crave to read more from women on the deeper matters of theology. While  mommy blogs and devotional material on women’s issues serve a good purpose, we don’t merely want to be sidelined to “women’s ministry,” but also be valued for our perspective and contribution to the areas that concern both men and women.
 
Deb Welch has followed up with a thoughtful and enlightening explanation for what has happened to the women’s voices that used to share a platform with many of the male bloggers today. The blogging atmosphere has certainly changed over the last ten years. When she first began blogging in 2005, The League of Reformed Bloggers and Jollyblogger facilitated a space for articles to be shared simultaneously, between men and women, so-called “top bloggers” and ordinary lay people alike, who contributed thoughtful insight. And bloggers wrote with passion on the issues facing the church, not just because they had a book coming out or needed to build a tribe to buy tickets to their next speaking gig.
 
Welch pinpoints a major shift in 2009, when some of the facilitators became ill and two key factors changed the blogging atmosphere:
 
1) an increase in tribalism, on the one hand, and 
2) a move toward commercialization and consumer-oriented approach on the other.
 
I think Deb hits on something big here. There are also some insightful comments in the thread where she linked her article on Facebook that women who would like to write publically feel insignificant now, like they need to be “somebody” important or married to a big name to matter. And yet, the comments continue that it’s the ordinary voices whom they want to hear more from because they don’t have an allegiance to the commercialized tent of evangelicalism.
 
Persis Lorenti also wrote an article reflecting on the importance of the context of the local church. Women are thriving where there is Word-based study over and against what the market is delegating us to. 
 
Interestingly, the timing of this discussion coincides well with tomorrow’s Mortification of Spin podcast. Over the summer, we interviewed Hannah Anderson to further discuss a topic she brought up in an article about the place of women in the parachurch culture. I’ve been looking forward to airing this important discussion. Why are there so few women speakers at Reformed, evangelical conferences? Do speakers at conferences hold some kind of ecclesial authority that extends beyond the church? At what level can women participate in the topics concerning the church? Has the commercialization and tribe building in the parachurch overshadowed and muddled the authority of the local church? 
 
This conversation is encouraging to me and I want to offer some encouragement to all those who have been contributing to it. I entered the blogging scene after the culture that Welch enjoyed. And when I began writing, it wasn’t because I had an ambition to be an author or was craving speaking gigs. I wrote out of my own loneliness as a woman who wanted to grow theologically. My kids were younger then, but I wanted more substance than the typical Christian mommy topics. I wrote because I wanted to motivate women to recognize their joy and responsibility as theologians, and I wanted to provide a tool to help churches disciple them in that way. 
 
I was not a "somebody." I am not a wife of a big name pastor. My husband is a public school teacher. I didn’t know anyone with a writing career or in the publishing industry. I was just a housewife in West Virginia. But I have found that if you’re not seeking a inner-circle position, you do have the freedom to say what you really want to say. And as we plug away in areas that we see a need and want to contribute, we tend to find like-minded people. 
 
I’ve never been a fan of the tribal language and constituency. But as I study God’s Word, read good books, participate in my church, and try to live the life of faith and obedience, writing has helped me to process what I am learning and communicate that with others. And what I have found is that there are other women like me. But not only that, there are men, pastors, and even professors who care to communicate with ordinary housewife theologians. Preachers and professors don’t go to seminary merely to be educated to talk to one another. The theological study in the seminaries should trickle down to the everyday housewife. 
 
Some of the comments on my last blog lamented how women over 40 missed the boat to build the platform of fifteen thousand followers that publishers are supposedly looking for. I want to say that I do not have an agent. I do not have a platform of that size. And I certainly didn’t have a huge number of followers when I signed my first book contract. I just had something to say, a lot of passion to communicate it, and a hope that others would want to join the conversation. People do still care about content.
 
As my thinking is being sharpened by this ongoing conversation, I propose that we adjust the way we look at platform. The definition of platform is not “how many people click on your blog.” Properly identifying it as “a body of principles on which a person or group takes a stand in appealing to the public,” I would align myself with the confessions of my local congregation. If we do this, then people don’t get reduced to numbers and all this confusion about authority can be put back where it belongs in local church office. Maybe then we can pull up some more seats at the table for women to participate in discussions. Maybe then we won't confuse conferences with our worship services. Because they certainly shouldn’t take the place of them.
 
And maybe then we will stop looking at people as brands.
Posted on Thursday, November 05, 2015 by Aimee Byrd on Housewife Theologian
Lisa Spence has written an excellent article, observing the lack of Christian women speakers and bloggers over 40, particularly at the large women’s conference that she was attending. This is a question I have been asking myself. I will be turning 40 in a couple of weeks, and I am disappointed that there are so few older women contributing in this way. 
 
Lisa expresses her gratitude that there are many younger women passionately writing and given a platform to do so, but laments the lack of more experienced, mature voices to speak to the issues that we are confronted with after the toddler rearing years. She suggests one reason why we don’t hear as much from women over 40:
 
I have one friend who recently had her mother to move in with her and her husband and daughter. She purchased a hospital bed as well as renovated a bathroom in order to be able to care for her mom. I have another friend enduring the heartache of a rebellious son, another who hasn’t spoken to her daughter in months. One friend suffers ongoing health problems, nothing life threatening, but the kind of difficulty that is both annoying and debilitating in its own way. Another friend is looking for a job for the first time in many years in order to help with college expenses for her child. Just last week I met a woman whose family has sold everything they own to pay for their son’s drug rehabilitation program.
 
I offer their examples to say this: a lot of us aren’t writing not because we don’t have anything to say but because we can’t say what we have to say. Not on a public forum. It’s one thing for a mommy blogger to write a post about a two year old’s tantrum at the grocery store; it’s another thing entirely when it’s the rebellion of your twenty something year old, not to mention the heartache and confusion therein.
 
Lisa makes a good point here. There is an issue of privacy that prevents us from writing about these personal matters. But I do hope that the women experienced in these areas are involved in helping disciple the younger women in their local churches, where these matters can be discussed more openly. And I do see that happening.
 
There are plenty of important issues that I have also refrained from writing about for this reason, but there’s more to it than this. The younger women have offered some great resources to help Christians who are beginning to learn more about the Christian life of faith and obedience. But I long for more women to write with some weightier teaching. Because older women have lived through experiences such as Lisa shares, they have hopefully dug deeper in the Word and have substantial and rich teaching they could now contribute.
 
And this is where I want to say what Lisa didn’t. Along with a handful of other experienced, faithful, and engaging women, Lisa writes for a blog called Out of the Ordinary, which I regularly go to for a more mature, feminine contribution to the Christian blogosphere. They tackle some of the "middle years" issues of the Christian life in an engaging and appropriate way. And they also offer great biblical insight and teaching. These women have been at it for a while now. But they barely get a platform. I’m thankful to see Tim Challies sharing some of their posts in his A La Cartes and The Aquila Report doing the same. But that’s about it.
 
Many of the big conference platforms and marketed book deals are invested in the younger women. I’m glad to see that young women have more resources to choose from these days, but what if we want to read about more than being a mother or the beginning foundations of the faith? Where are the more academic or doctrinal contributions from women? Where are the women being included in theological conversations with men that are not on mere token women’s issues? There are some, but the ratio is way out of whack. 
 
Has the Reformed church invested so little into their women that there are only a few that can contribute on a deeper theological level? I don’t think that is the case. But have we adequately shown that we need and value their insight and teaching? And is what they share something the men can also benefit from? 
 
The few women over 40 who do have a decent platform in the reformed community could probably use some company. And I know that the church would benefit greatly if we could increase that number.